the Trigger-happy housewife

Bringing the constantly fantastic and painfully insane together daily!

Lost and found…

on January 30, 2013

and lost again? Funny how that works, isn’t it. I guess that you just have to know you’ll be found again. I keep that faith burning.

As I have mentioned earlier this week I have been sick, fibromyalgia has been flaring and my entire being wants to lay down and stay down. We go, I go. Everyday, all day. From up early making breakfast for the wife – read my Bible and devotional – wake kids/start school – make them breakfast – teach – make them lunch – teach/clean – dancing – run – cook dinner… I go! On Saturday I have generally already ran 3-6 miles, cooked breakfast and attended a WW meeting (to visit friends really I don’t follow the program for many reasons I have shared on my old blog and Youtube channel and will tell anyone who will ask) by 9:30 in the morning, then I go grocery shopping, make lunch, clean, make dinner……. It doesn’t stop. (Look I love my life, I am lucky and blessed and LOVE it being full – I am just trying to tell you where I am coming from.) So, by Sunday last I was worn thin and I was beyond tired. Beyond.

I over slept – our church is 45 minutes away and I have to wake the kids, finalize their outfit choices and fix hair as well as over see the teeth brushing and general getting ready (if left alone they will go back to sleep!) I make coffee for the wife and breakfast for the family. I get me ready. I usually get up by 6:45 – I slept till 8:09 – I really just wanted to blow it off. The kids love it, I love it, I made a personal goal to never miss church unless the cause it absolute. (i.e. severe illness of self or child, dead car) I drug myself out of bed, did all the things I do and still somehow got out the door on time. We arrived before the service had even begun! Snap! My children were so excited and my heart was full instantly. My wife was moved and I felt filled. It was a word I would not have wanted to miss and in the end, I am so glad I pushed.

Doing things a bit differently this go round. The plan is to keep it going, even when it isn’t clicking for me, when I don’t feel it, because that’s when I need to keep it going the most. Also, I’ve learned that when I don’t feel it – that’s me. God doesn’t get sick or tired or bored or over it. I do. I get to those places and then assign the distance I create to the fact that I have let God down, when really I just let myself down. Somehow I think the late start and the feeling bad made the whole thing even better, like when it is hard it pays off even more. Thank God.


2 responses to “Lost and found…

  1. This comment was left on my 43things account:
    For some reason WordPress wouldn’t let me comment on your blog…so I’ve pasted below what I tried to comment there. I know it’s not exactly the correct place but it’s the only place I could tell you what I wanted to say…here goes!
    Hi there! I have read your blog since Little FAT Me and I love it! I think you are simply amazing and sometimes when you write I feel like you took the words right out of my mouth. This post is particularly touching to me as I seem to be creating this huge space between God and I. At first it was unintentional but now it seems like I almost decide to create the space. Reading this made me realize that I can blame it on whatever I want but in the end it is me. God doesn’t change…He doesn’t create distance. I do. I’m so glad He loves us unconditionally. Time to start bridging that gap. Thank you! Thank you for posting this and for your blog in general…I always gain something from it! I have recently started a blog…please drop in and check it out… Keep on writing girl! You never know who you are helping. Today you put salve on the hole in my heart…let the healing begin! 🙂

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