the Trigger-happy housewife

Bringing the constantly fantastic and painfully insane together daily!

If only. (A truly shameful poem.)

on October 15, 2013

If you were dead

I could love you

like I did last week.

I could be mad

at the world

and at God.

I could blame doctors

or drunk drivers

or cancer.

At least I would still have you

in my heart,

in my memories.

If you were dead

I wouldn’t be haunted

by hope

that you will change

that you will care

that you might be someone else one day.



I know that this is a horrible poem and I want to be sure to say that I am glad this person isn’t dead, I love them and I want them to find happiness. Just, not with me. Not anymore. This was written in a very painful moment and I put it here because I try to be very honest, this is part of my honesty…


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